ČẢṨŤĨΣŁ

I am suffering right now. I am focusing myself in
meditation and reflection to ease that suffering

sometimes I wish myself to harden my heart, to close down, to safeguard against another imperfect human... to safeguard myself against my own mistaken actions

sometimes I want to go far away.. another everything...
sometimes I want other people to go far away... time & space
sometimes I want to be cared about so much that another would make sure they never hurt me...
sometimes I want to be irreplaceable and unforgettable..
sometimes I wish that no one knew me at all...
. sometimes I fear that no one really knows me at all


....Throughout my life I had to experience the pain
So much pain ...and I still Do

I turn to Higher Powers and keep trust that I am beloved and
that I will not be betrayed by the Higher Power
.I have learned that I must turn all the hurt and fear over to It

I pray that I will learn what's destined for me
to learn and will be bathed in the Light after the tunnel is endured. I've learned to call it Faith


I've come to realize there is always light even within the ... tunnel... it comes out from my heart Our hearts


Always the tunnel ends. Always


.I pray for protection and guidance
.I pray for wisdom and discipline
.I pray for compassion and love
.I pray for a long and deep dive through Life

Xx .. The End